Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film For Theaters - IN MOVIE PLACE ROOMS TODAY! GO SEE IT!

This came out today. At that place with the tasty popcorn, the cup holders, and stadium seating. No, I'm not talking about the truck stop showers. I'm talking movie-watching buildings. You need to go see this. Awesome things need to be shown love. Like the 1984 Henry Thomas/Dabney Coleman movie Cloak And Dagger. And this movie. So go see it. Now. I mean it. Get your lazy ass up and go. It's your duty as an American to see this movie. You can do that thing you were going to do later. So, in summation, go see Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film For Theaters now. And also click on the above poster to go to the movie's official website. You don't want to be called a name for not doing either of those things. Names like "feeny" or "dorkula". Or "Kevin's Mom".

Still not certain, well sink your ocular orbs into this!

Critics are talking...with words they speak!

"...don't expect a coherent plot..."

- Claudia Puig, USA Today

"Succeed[s] enough of the time to make a perversely entertaining movie."

- Peter Travers, Rolling Stone

"Crudely animated, tasteless, and totally pointless, which I'm sure the filmmakers would say is the point."

- M. K. Terrell, Christian Science Monitor

"The big question for fans is does Aqua Teen Hunger Force have enough gags and giggles to translate to 86 minutes on the big screen? And the answer is ... yeah, sort of, well, maybe."

- Bob Townsend, Atlanta Journal-Constitution

"Narrative's beside the point in a movie created by two guys who gorge on pop culture's high-fat diet and regurgitate it into something approaching . . . art? Close enough."

- Robert Wilonsky, The Village Voice

"If George W Bush could prove that Saddam Hussein had funded this movie I would reverse my stance on the Iraq War and say that every single civilian casualty was justified."

- Devin Faraci, CHUD.com

"You have to give these guys this much: They remained true to their twisted vision, and that's exciting to see."

- Christy Lemire, The Associated Press

"By the end, you may feel as if you've been ballroom dancing with a live, exposed electric guitar cord for an hour and a half. At peak performance, it's wired, chaotic madness."

- Jan Stewart, Newsday

I've seen Grindhouse!!!

Wow.

I do believe my ass got handed to me.

I echo the sentiment of others, that Planet Terror feels more Carpenter-esque (especially Rodriguez's excellent score) than '70s grindhouse but that makes it no less enjoyable. I thought Jeff Fahey's BBQ joint owner was a terrifically quirky character.

As for Death Proof, I found it to be a different animal altogether. I've read comments that it's a bit too talky for its own good, and that's a valid point; however, it never felt like I was watching a series of boring monologues. Death Proof is a diametric opposite to the over-the-top mayhem of Planet Terror, and when the final third of the movie starts, it's white knuckles all the way. Kurt Russell is great as always; Stuntman Mike is a crazy psychopath and Russell is full of maniacal glee throughout.

And the fake trailers? Edgar Wright's Don't was the best faux trailer; the packed crowd I saw this with loved every moment: the "scratchy print", the "commercials", the "motion picture ratings" and every "missing reel". The 3 hours and 15 minutes flew by.

This weekend, you can see a kick-ass double feature that'll make you rediscover how much fun going to the movies can be...or you see a founding member of N.W.A. in a remake of Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House.

Grindhouse is an exhilarating experience, one I can't wait to enjoy again.




(Plus I received a free Grindhouse poster.)